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Monday, July 23, 2012

Shame and Faith


I know that I struggle with a lot of shame in my life. There is a person that I want to be. There is a person that I long for. I want to be full of love and compassion. I want wisdom. I want kindness. I want to have character. I want to be know as someone who treasures Christ above all else. I want to be someone who encourages others. I want to be someone who listens well and is able to speak truth in peoples lives. I want to live the way I know I should live.

Yet so often I fail in being who I want to be. I stand before God with shame that I am sinner. I stand before God embarrassed that he calls me his child. I know how little my life reflects him. I stand broken before a holy God.

It's times like this that I have only one place to look. I have to look at Christ. I have to look to the one who has lived the life that I wanted to live. I have to look to the one who has obeyed the law in all parts. I have to look to the one who has taken joy in obeying the father. I have to look to the one who delights in God's law. I have to look to the one that that the father finds pleasure in. I have to fall down an turn my eyes to my Lord. I have to turn to the one who has paid the price that I should have paid. I have to come and look.

I have to come broken before God and ask for what I do not deserve. I have to come empty. I need grace.

A good friend of mine puts it this way "Faith is empty. Your weak, God has the strength. You need wisdom, God has the wisdom. You are hungry, God has the bread. You are thirsty, God has the water. Faith is empty. It's not hard to be saved. All you have to do is fall down. Who cannot fall down? Who cannot be strong. All you have to do is fall. All you have to do is be broken."

It's in these moments that I know there is another that God looks to when he sees me. He sees me in Christ. He sees me being who I want. He dose not see me as I am. He takes joy in me. He loves me with the same love that he has for his Son.

So how do you get your life on track? How do you grown in faith? Let me offer these words.

"Stop looking at your faith, and rivet your attention on Christ. Faith is sustained by looking at Christ, crucified and risen, not by turning from Christ to analyze your faith."

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